collected by Joe Bethancourt
PO Box 35190 Phoenix Az 85069
locksley@indirect.com
The opinions expressed in some of the verses are not necessarily the opinions
of Joe Bethancourt, his dog, wife, kids, family or friends. Joe's cats think
the whole thing is stupid, and the ferrets don't care.
*
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THE ORIGINS OF "REAL OTR"
John Boardman, the East Coast collector of this song, says in _ANAKREON_ #8
(1 Nov., 1980): "So far, two different stories have come in of how "That Real
Old Time Religion" originated. Robin R. Arnhold writes that "Lady Cybele"
started it a decade or more ago, and says that (five of the early verses) are
of her composition, with a chorus of "Give Me That Old Craft Religion." 'The
first exposure to people other than Madison-area pagans came when Lady Cybele
sang some of her songs in informal sessions at the Gnostica festivals in the
early 1970's.' "
"But Allison Harlow claims that 'Victor Anderson, the blind shaman of San
Leandro...first began singing these verses; we taught the idea to NROOGD and
_Nemeton_, whence it caught on in the Mid-West...and finally reached the East
Coast.'"
John writes further in _ANAKREON_ #12 (1 Nov. 1981): "Rus (Gulevitch) has a
resolution of the situation presented in _ANAKREON_ #8, in which two
different stories of the origin of "That Real Old Time Religion" were
presented:"
" 'I've heard about Cybele being the originator of OTR, too,' he wrote, 'But
I also heard that several covens (who had no contact with each other) got the
same idea at different times, and Cybele is but the one who first made it
more or less public. Such things happen often enough.' "
To which I (Joe Bethancourt) can only add that I heard it in the early 1970's
and I have been collecting, and enjoying it ever since.
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A PARTIAL LIST OF CONTRIBUTORS
These verses were written or contributed by:
Abby, Margot Adler, Poul Anderson, Ardjukk Afraid-Of-His-Cats, Robin R.
Arnhold, Dave Aronson, Astryd, Johnathan Baker, Kevin Barkes, "Hugo t. Bear,"
Beth of Demeter's Beehive, Joe Bethancourt, Kihe Blackeagle, Mark Blackman,
Blackthorn, Blue Star Grove, John Boardman, Brian Burley, Clan MacChluarain,
Care, Catbad, Rick Cook, Don Cook, Greg Costikyan, Michele Cox, Diane
Crockett, Lady Cybele, the Dark Horde, John Desmond, Rick Detar, Terri
Dorrosch, Dragomyr the Cossack, Will Duquette, Earil, Elfwork, Dick Eney,
Ravan Fairgrove, Leslie Fish, Al Frank, Corrina Frank, Filthy Pierre, "J.
Random Folksinger," Anne Friend, Gabriel, Janice Gelb, Cemoc Gilcrom, Daniel
S. Goodman, Harold Groot, Rus Gulevitch, Gwetholyn from Rhode Island, PDP11
Hacker, Haragano, Allison Harlow, Heather, John Hedtke, Brad Hicks, Chip
Hitchcock, Tracy Holland, Judson Horning, Hypatia, Steve Jackson, Kram, Fred
Kuhn, Karl Lembke, Leonard Lake, Last Verse Littlejohn, Cheryl Lloyd, Lucina,
Lyra, Major Matt Mason, Jean Michele Martin, Michael from the Bronx, Digger
McGilp, Greg McMullan, Catherine Olanich, Florence P., Gregg Palmer, Ron
Parshley, Mack Pitchford, Dave Policar, Murray Porath, Prudence Priest,
Promethean Coven, "Puck," Brother Radamus, Eric Raymond, John Redford, Alice
Rhodes, Doug Rice, Mad Richard, Erich Rickheit, Rowanhold Bardic Circle, Roz,
Dan Ruvin, Sabina, Ben Sansing, Louise Sansing, Dave Schwartz, Peter Seeger,
Kay Shapero, Gianni Siri, Skia, Dana Snow, Geneva Steinberg, Ruth Sylvester,
Glen R. Taylor, Bruce Tomlin, Torve, Vanthi Coven, David Weingart, John Wenn,
Russ Williams, Dani Zweig, the nut-cases on the Filk and SCA sigs (both
InterNet and Fido,) and the usual "Traditional" or "Anonymous" which is a
good way of keeping Angry Villagers armed with rakes, scythes, pitchforks,
torches and dental tools away from your door. And probably several more
people but I dunno who they are. And they probably won't admit to it.
I have categorized the verses as best that I and a roomful of references
could do. If I have anything placed wrongly, let me know. Nicely.
Please don't take offense that I have not given the author's names for each
verse....in many cases, I honestly don't know precisely who wrote which ones,
and if it's any consolation, there are quite a few in here that I wrote, and
have not put my name to either. After all, this song belongs to EVERYONE,
which is why I have -not- claimed copyright to any verses.
You are herewith invited to sing this song at every opportunity, to use it to
puncture Windbags, annoy Jerks, and in general have a wonderful time laughing
at our human foibles and follies....for (the) God(s) love(s) laughter.
If you wanna think that I am some kind of Evil Rotten Person for this song,
then all I can say is "Get a life!" And then write some verses that express
-your- opinions and send them to me. I'll be more than happy to include them,
if they are not Terminally Obscene to the point of legal action.
Joe Bethancourt
PO Box 35190
Phoenix, AZ 85069
locksley@indirect.com
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*
THE REAL OLD TIME RELIGION
(Tune: "Old Time Religion")
(Chorus): Give me that real old time religion (3X)
It's good enough for me!
AFRICAN PAGANISM
We will hang out with Anansi I will visit with Nyame
He's the spider god we fancy The Ashanti god of all, hey
And he wears eight legged pants, He's I will bring him a salami
got enough legs there for me! And we'll both sit down to tea!
AGNOSTICS AND ATHEISTS
Lots of folks are into God Let us praise God for creation
And I've often thought it odd And he made more than one nation
Do they love Him for His bod'? Let's give Him a big ovation,
Or is it ideology? And then tell Him "Let us be!"
I don't care about Jehover It's the Fundie Right's solution
Soon his office term is over To put Christian absolution
I would sooner worship Rover In the U.S. Constitution
'Cause he's good enough for me! And that don't sit well with me!
I won't go into no temple I shall stay a firm agnostic
Not for Graham nor Miss Semple I can't do a double-crostic
No, not even for a "semple" I'm a fan of Barry Bostwick
It ain't good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
If you think religion's awful But the True Religion's Science
And you've really had your craw full Where we place our great reliance
Just be sure your acts are lawful 'Cause it's laws don't take defiance
Or they'll -all- be after thee! So it's good enough for me!
We will go and worship Jesus We give thanks to Jerry Falwell
Yes we will, when Hades freezes If his Crusade we can't stall, well,
He is full of guilt and fleases Ship him one-way to Rabaul - well!
Which ain't good enough for me! that's not far enough for me!
Are you waiting for the Rapture? Whene'er I hear Jerry Falwell
Superstition's got you captured! Quite soon I don't feel at all well
You believe a lot of crap, sure Throw him down a sacrificial well
Isn't good enough for me! That'll be good enough for me!
There are those who worship no gods Madelyn Murray O'Hare hollers
For they think that there are low odds Let's get God from off our dollars
That the god-seers aren't drunk sods God is something I can't swaller
And they're good enough for me! 'Cause he's got more balls than me!
There are those that sing out "Amen!" Are you waiting for the Rapture?
To a bastard Jewish shaman Go on, wait, and see if I care!
You know who, so I won't name him I'll go off and take a nap, sure
But it's good enough for me! Isn't good enough for me!
Call Him God, or call him Allah The very first of chiromancers
The priest will take your dollah Overdosed on mood-enhancers
Easy living from -your- follah- And found his palm had all the answers
-wers, but sorry, -not- from me! Which is good enough for me!
You can keep your Old Religion, Jehovah's fine transcendence
It's for suckers and for pigeons! And the Church's great resplendence
I don't buy it! Not a smidgen! Pushing guilt and co-dependence
I'm an atheist, you see! Ain't good enough for me!
AGNOSTIC/ATHEIST CHORUS: Gimme NO kind-a religion
Gimme NO kind-a religion
Gimme NO kind-a religion
It simply ain't for me!
ASATRU AND ODINISM
I hear Valkyries a-comin One-eyed Odin we will follow
In the air their song is comin And in fighting we will wallow
They forgot the words! They're hummin! Till we wind up in Valhallow
But they're good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
We will drive up to Valhalla It was good enough for Odin
Riding Beetles, not Impalas Though the tremblin' got forbodin'
Singing "Deutschland Uber Alles" Then the giants finally strode in,
And that's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Loki Shall we sing a verse for Thor,
It was good enough for Loki Though he leaves the maidens sore?
He thinks Thor's a little hokey They always come back for more,
And that's good enough for me! So he's good enough for me!
Shall we sing in praise of Loki, It was good for Thor and Odin
Though he left poor Midgard smokey? It was good for Thor and Odin
Oh, his sense of humor's hokey, Grab an axe and get your woad on!
But he's good enough for me! and it's good enough for me!
All the Gods tore into Loki We will worship now with vigor
Saying Deicide is hokey! The goddess known as Frigga
And they threw him in the pokey! Tho there are some who don't dig her
And that's good enough for me! She is good enough for me!
Good old Thor's the god of thunder If you wanna worship Odin
Really helps us get our plunder You don't have to have a coat on
Tho his head's still truly dunder Grab a sword and slap some woad on
He is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
In the halls of Frey and Freya We will sing a verse for Loki
All the priestesses will lay ya He's the old Norse god of Chaos
If you're good enough, they'll pay ya! Which is why this verse don't
And that's good enough for me! rhyme or scan or nothin'
But it's good enough for me...
Odin is a mighty thinker Give a hand to darlin' Freya
And he is a heavy drinker There's no need to ask her "May ya?"
With the girls he likes to tinker For a necklace she will lay ya!
So he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will go and worship Loki We will go to Utgard Castle
He will tell a dirty jokie We'll watch Thor and Elli wrassle
And get locked up in the pokey Thor will have a lot of hassle
But that's good enough for me! But he's god enough for me!
We will go and worship Frigga It was good enough for Thor 'n'
And the men will be much bigga I can hear the thunder roarin'
And they won't have a hair-trigga Or maybe it's his snorin'!
And that's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
Do you know what brought Balder low We will all go worship Hoenir
His Achilles heel, mistletoe Who has ears that hear by sonar
His systems are no longer "Go" And a most impressive boner!
But he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will raise our cups to Bragi It was good enough for Loki
And we'll drink until we're groggy Whose humor was okey-dokey
And the pretzels get all soggy He'd laugh and take a tokey
But that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will ask a boon of Mimir We will walk upon ol' Bifrost
With the Northern Lights a-glimmer Tell ol' Heimdall that we're not lost
I would not mind being slimmer Ask Odin what the runes cost
Which is good enough for me! And hit Loki with a pie!
BRUJA
Let us sing for Brujaria We will watch a Bruja giggle
Though the blood's a lot less cleaner; At a novice witch's wiggle
It's not Christian Santaria For you see, a Bruja's giggle
So it's good enough for me! Is a Brou-ha-ha to me!
BUDDHISM
We will all go to Nirvana Oh we all will follow Buddah
So be sure to mind your manners Oh we all will follow Buddah
Make a left turn at Savannah And we'll eat no food but Gouda
And we'll see the Promised Land! Which is Gouda-nuff for me!
It was good enough for Buddha, We will go and sing "Hosanna"
As a god he's kinda cute-a, To our good ol' pal, Gautama,
And he comes in brass or pewta' He will never flim or flam ya',
So he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
No one wrote a verse for Buddah We will all go to Nirvana
Tho I think they really coulda We will all go to Nirvana
And I really think they shoulda Make a left turn at Urbana
'Cause he's good enough for me! And you'll see the Promised Land!
We will all follow Buddah We will venerate the Buddah
He's one really serene dude-a Comes in silver, brass and pewta'
But you have to beg for food-a He ain't quite the Lion of Judah
And that's good enough for me! But he's good enough for me!
We will sing for Yama-Dharma Maybe I should try ol' Buddah
At our revels on the farm-a We can share a little Gouda
Though it messes up our karma I hope he won't think it rude-a
It's good enough for me! Me to say he's not for me!
I am darn confused by Zen Clap one hand if you love the Buddha
It seems way beyond my ken It will put ya in the mood ta
Could you say it all again Set off for Nirvana
Somewhat clearer so I'll see? And that's good enough for me!
CARGO CULT & PACIFIC ISLANDS
To the tune of Handel's "Largo" If you get too tired
We will hymn the gods of Cargo And you need to get up higher
'Til they slap on an embargo Just have Pele light your fire!
And that's good enough for me! From her island in the sea!
You can keep your saints with halos, It was good enough for Maui
Your incense, hymns and aloes: And for his communion chow he
Let's throw virgins in volcanos! Served up poi and long pig - Wowee!
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will go and worship Maui We will watch the hula dancers
With that Polynesian zowie Topless Polynesian prancers
And he'll give us Maui Wowee! And we'll get pagan romance, sir
And that's stoned enough for me! And go to Easter Island, free!
CHRISTIAN
We will worship with the Fundies Say the Baptists, "We're the only
With their itchy hair-shirt undies We're the one church that's not phony
If they don't bring "Mrs. Grundy," If you give us all your money
Then it's good enough for me! Then to Heaven you shall go!
It was good for old Jehovah Let's all listen up to Jesus
He had a son who was a nova! He says rich folks like old Croesus
Hey there, Mithras! Move on ova'! Will be damned until Hell freezes
Another resurrection Day! And that don't sound good to me!
Jerry Falwell thinks he's sav-ed Oh we'll all be Fundamental
In a lamb's blood he's been lav-ed And be Holy Testamental
And HE thinks that I'M deprav-ed And never Trancendental
But that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Tho J.C.'s into fish, too, Anytime that I start hearin'
He's an avatar of Vishnu "Jesus loves you" I start leerin'
So he is welcome here, too, Maybe so, but not like Brian
And that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
Brother Jerry is a cretin Brother Oral's in his tower,
But with all the cash he's gettin' Trusting in the Lord's power
Lotsa folks'll be forgettin Getting richer by the hour,
It's the "Land of the Free!" Now he's got the ransom fee!
Brother Robert's church is Crystal Brother Earnest is a healer
But all the Bible that he's missed'll And not QUITE a wheeler-dealer --
Make you "hotter than a pistol" More a jumper and a squealer
But he's good enough for me! So he's good enough for me!
Brother Jim and Sister Tammy Then there's good ol' Brother Billy
Had a show that was a whammy Bringing souls in willy-nilly.
But now they are in Miami All his trips are kinda silly,
Tryin' t'get back on TV! But he's good enough for me!
That Bob Larson shrieks and hollers We will finally pray to Jesus
Fighting demons in his callers From our sins we hope he frees us
Save his program: SEND YOUR DOLLARS! Eternal life he guarantees us
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
You could join Jehovah's Witness And let's not forget Pelagius
Running door to door for fitness Though some call him outrageous
Well if you've been blessed with quickness, He is pious and courageous
Then thats good enough for me And he's good enough for me!
Oh the Christians worship Jesus Oh my name is Torquemada
But their sermons sure don't please us I burn Lutherans in Grenada
It's a Sin each time ya sneezes It's all for the Holy Fadda
That ain't good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
We will worship Christian Jesus It was down in Waco, Texas
And do just like John Paul pleases When they came to arrest us
That we will... when Hades freezes! We needed britches of asbestos
And that's good enough for me! That was hot enough for me!
It was good for Oral Roberts We will witness for Jehovah
It was good for Oral Roberts Sell "Watchtower" ten times over
Not so good for elves and hobbits But it ain't no bed of clover
And it's good enough for me! So I'm sorry; not for me!
Whether Low Church or it's High Church And the Romans said of Jesus
Or it's Pie-Up-In-The-Sky Church "Lets kill him, he don't please us"
Come on down and visit my Church "But the Atheists will tease us"
'Cause it's good enough for me! And thats good enough for me
Well you can worship Jesus It's no good for Billy Graham
Go ahead and pray to Jesus 'Cause he just won't give a damn
But I tell you, he don't please us 'Cause he's too much of a ham
Just leave my Gods to me! But it's good enough for me!
Others followed Rev. Jim Jones Oh the Christian sects they will clutch
In Guyana they found their bones At their dogmatic hate-crutch
Kool-Aid mixed with cyanide stones! I'm afraid that is just too much
That ain't good enough for me! Sects and violence for me!
Well I hear your god's named Jesus Take the Blarney Stone and pitch it
You can do just as you pleases To the nuns of St. Bridget
Even bless me if I sneezes Tho they're pious, they're not frigid
Cause its good enough for me! And they're good enough for me!
It was good enough for Jesus Let us pray to the Virgin Mary
Though Paul's doctrine doesn't please us Let us pray to the Virgin Mary
We prefer a faith that frees us As our Rosary we carry
And that's good enough for me And she's good enough for me!
CLASSICAL PAGANISM
We will go to worship Zeus You can dance and wave the thyrsos
Though his morals are quite loose And sing lots of rowdy verses
He gave Leda quite a goose Till the neighbors holler curses,
And he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will pray to Father Zeus We will sing for great Diana
In his temple we'll hang loose Who will teach of love and honor
Eating roast beef au jus, But you really gotta wanna!
And that's good enough for me! 'Cause she's tough enough for me!
Shall we sing a verse for Venus, We went off to worship Venus
Of the Gods she is the meanest, By the Gods! You should have seen us!
Cause she bit me on my...elbow! Now the Clinic has to screen us...
And it's good enough for me! But that's good enough for me!
We will venerate old Bacchus It was good enough for Sappho
Drinking beer and eating tacos With her lady on her lap-o
Til you've tried it please don't knock us She put Lesbos on the map-o
'Cause it's good enough for me! With her pagan poetry!
Let us raise a toast to Bacchus, When we worship Bacchus
We will raise a royal ruckus, The ethanol will sock us
Then we'll lay us down and f**k us We'll all get good and raucous
That's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Diana is a little spikey We'll sing praises to Apollo;
And she is a little dyke-ey Where the Sun God leads we'll follow
You don't have to be a Psych-e ('Though his head's a little hollow)
To know that's right for me! He's good enough for me!
We will worship with Poseidon Don't neglect that shrine of Zeus'
We will meet him when the tide's in Tho he's lost his vital juices
All the maidens he will ride in The old boy still has his uses
Then he'll give 'em all to me! And he's good enough for me!
All the hunters start convergin' We will all bow to Hephaestus
When Diana is emergin' As a blacksmith he will test us
It's too bad she's still a virgin 'Cause his balls are pure asbestos
But there's still hope left for me! So he's good enough for me!
And what about this Bacchus, There is room enough in Hades
Who lives just to raise a ruckus? For lots of criminals and shadies
Loosens women so they'll f**k us, And disreputable ladies,
Well, that's good enough for me! And they're good enough for me!
We will all see Aphrodite And to help things get real racous
Though she's pretty wild and flighty The priests of Pan and Bacchus
She will meet us in her nightie Will hold a f***ing contest!
And she's good enough for me! And that's all right with me!
Oh we will go and worship Pan, Bumper stickers of all sizes
'Cause he just don't give a damn! At quite reasonable prices
Grab a woman or a man, They say 'ankh' if you love Isis
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Was a time, so I've heard tell, a We all worshipped Dionysus
Fine and promising young fella 'Till we ran into a crisis:
Gave his all to serve Cybele The bar had raised its prices;
But that's damn well not for me! That's not good enough for me!
We'll sing praises to Apollo There's that lusty old Priapus
Where the Sun-God leads, I'll follow He's just itching to unwrap us.
From Ionia to Gaul-o (He'd do more to us than tap us
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!)
We will have a mighty Party Pan's pipes got plugged last summer
In the honor of Astarte And it really was a bummer
Grab your chiton - don't be tardy Finally had to call a plumber!
'Cause she's good enough for me! But he's good enough for me!
In his dancing Pan will lead them Now Danae was sweet as flowers,
When his pipes call we will heed them She was into golden showers;
In truth tho, he don't need them And that showed her Zeus' power
He's more than enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Venus We will sing our staves to Venus
She'd have sighed if she'd of seen us We will sing our staves to Venus
Letting morals come between us Tho I think this rhyme is henious
And she's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
There's one thing that I do know Let us dance with Dionysus
Zeus' favorite is Juno And get drunk on wine and spices
She's the best at doing...you know! The Christians call them "vices"
And that's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
It was good enough for Cupid We will venerate old Hermes
It was good enough for Cupid With his staff entwined with wormies
His wings look kind of stupid Warding off the nasty germies
But that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Let's all drink to Dionysus We will all bow down to Venus
Wine and women beyond prices! As we dance upon Mt. Zenos
He made a Maenad out of my Sis! We will worship with our....voice
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
There are those who, when they've got e-
Normous problems that are knotty
They just take them to Hecate We all worship Aphrodite,
And that's good enough for me! And Her sister bold Astarte,
They both throw a lovely party,
In the church of Aphrodite And that's just fine with me!
She's a mighty righteous sightie,
The Priestess wears a see through nightie
And she's good enough for me
We remember Ariadne Tho they wrote "Star Spangled Banner"
To whom Theseus was a cad, he On Anacreon's pinanner
Split and left her feeling badly He has such a laid-back manner
Good old Baccus set her free! That he's good enough for me!
Anacreon's drinkin' hearty If you plan to court Medusa
At a never-ending party At her place in Syracusa
Charter member from the start, he's Take a mirror; what's the use-a
Got the seat I'd like for me! Getting stoned before your spree?
To Prometheus let us hark Aphrodite in her bower
In bringing fire, he made his mark Calls her lovers by the hour
Or we'd be dancing in the dark Joyful loving is her dower
And that's not good enough for me! And she's good enough for me!
Pan and all the satyrs prayed in If you have the itchy-squirmies
Chorus when they saw a maiden Then you better pray to Hermes
"What a great place to get laid in!" He will cure you of your germies
And it's good enough for me! And he's good enough for me!
We had better worship Neptune If you pray unto Uranus
We had better worship Neptune Then your crime is truly henious
If we don't we'll all be wet soon You can stick it in your...songbook
And that's wet enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Let us all join with the Dryads A most vile persisten lecher
Let us all join with the Dryads Scorned by one, set out to catch her
Trees may not be quite the Triad When his magic couldn't fetch her
But they're good enough for me! Poor Atlanta turned to me!
It was good for Greek Apollo We will frolic with old Bacchus
Though his act is hard to follow We don't care if some folks mock us
Full of lyres I cannot swallow 'Cause his rites are rather raucous
But it's good enough for me! And they're good enough for me!
It was good for old Achilles We will even worship Hades
Though death gave his Mom the willies Though he dwells among the shadies
She Styx-dipped him by the heelies He still picks up pretty ladies
And that's good enough for me! And he's good enough for me!
We will worship Aphrodite In the Temple of Apollo
We will worship Aphrodite All the laurel leaves we'll swallow
'Cause we've seen her in her nightie Then the colored trails will follow
And that's good enough for me! And that's stoned enough for me!
Let us never forget Puck We will worship old Apollo
Leads us wand'ring thru the muck He's got others beat all hollow
He don't give a flying f*** Let him lead and we will follow
But he's Fool enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will worship old Poseidon We will run the Lupercalia
And the dolphin he's a-ridin' With our leather paraphenalia
Tho it has a scaly hide on Substitute for genitalia
Still, that's good enough for me! That ain't good enough for me!
It was good for fair Apollo It was good for lovely Artemis
For the Sun's rays he doth follow Who'd like to get to the heart of us
He'll be back again tomorrow She's glad to be a part of us
And that's good enough for me! And she's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Hecate At Troy nobody was mean-a
She's trying to make a witch of me That the Great Goddess Athena
I wish I could choose which one of three Mopped them up with Ajax clean-a
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
If you're worshipping Athena It was good enough for Hades
Then your morals must be clean-a Tho I'm glad he didn't make us
And your brain a little keen-a At least, he won't try to save us
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We've neglected Father Zeus We will worship Queen Omphale
Tho it seems a bit obtuse Who drove Heracles to folly
We think more of Mother Goose For they dressed in drag, by golly!
But he's good enough for me! I dunno if that's for me!
We will all go worship Plutus Young Bacchus in the springtime
And with riches he'll salute us Leads the dancers round the grapevine
All that gold would surely suit us Soon those grapes are gonna be wine
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Demeter's bees within the hive Dionysius drank his wine down
Hum with joy to be alive And the Bacchae stumbled all 'round
Matriarchy is no jive And the pirate ship went aground
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will go and worship Juno In the temple which is Hebe's
For there's one thing that we do know And constructed by the Sea-Bees
She did not burn Brother Bruno She can cure the heebie-jeebies
And that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
We're not crazy over Aries We will go and worship Vesta
For his men give us the scaries For her cooking is the best-a
And they kill like Christ's and Mary's All the food at the fiesta
Which ain't good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
I'll bow down and worship Ops Let us pray to our Demeter
'Cause we think that she is tops In the fields we'll go to greet her
Turns a lotta guys into Pops Then we'll grind her up and eat her
And she's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
Let us all sing for the Dryad Let us run from the Bacchantes
Let us all sing for the Dryad For they're not your maiden Aunties
For Bulldozers make them may-ad And they don't wear underpanties
But they're good enough for me! But they're mad enough for me!
It was good enough for Cybele We will -not- go worship Aries
She brought Attis back from Hell Tho his chest's a mat o' hair, he's
Though his tee-tee wasn't well Down on Wogs and Pinks and Fairies
But it's good enough for me And that isn't cool, by me!
We will all team up in dyads Sweet Persephone was roaming
With the Oreads and Dryads Through the meadows far from home 'n
Succubi and Sylphs and Naiads Pluto grabbed her -- awful omen!
Cause we like variety! (Though it shows he has good taste...)
COMMUNISIM
Millions Marx and Lenin follow Some still worship Chairman Mao
In the "Little Red Book" wallow But I'll bet that Deng Xiao -
Their Party line I cannot swallow Ping will soon bring back the Dao
There are better gods for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will worship Karl Marx There are some who fall a-grinnin'
Carry Red Flags in the parx At the cult of Marx and Lenin
Only make love in the darx They kill heretics for sinnin'
And that's Marxism to me! And that's proof enough for me!
CONFUCIANISM
Let us read works of Confucius We used to study old Confucius
As we walk thru Massachusetts As we sat there on our tushes
In white robes that freeze our tushes We're learning but don't push us
But it's good enough for me! And thats good enough for me
CTHULHU
We will worship mighty Cthulhu We will worship Great Cthulhu,
H. P. Lovecraft's big old hoodoo We will worship Great Cthulhu,
(1930's fiction voodoo....) And we'll feed him Mr. Sulu
But that's good enough for me! 'Cause that's good enough for me!
Let us sing to Lord Cthuhlu We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
Don't let Lovecraft try to fool you We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
Or the Elder Gods WILL rule you Burn a candle for Yog-Soggoth
And that's good enough for me! And the Goat With a Thousand Young
Of the Old Ones, none is vaster Well it's good enough for *
Even Cthulhu's not his master He's a mighty kinky master
I refer to the unspeakable * When you pray he goes much faster
and that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
(* - well, do YOU want to say it?)
And for those who follow Cthulhu Let's go worship Great Cthulhu,
We have really got a lulu: And run naked like a Zulu,
Drop a bomb on Honolulu! You and me and Mr. Sulu,
'Cause that's good enough for you! And that's good enough for me!
We will worship Great Cthulhu We will worship Holy Cthulhu
You and me and Mr. Sulu And we'll run around like Zulus
Howling like a drunken Zulu Then we'll feed him Mr. Sulu,
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Cthulhu We will bow down to Cthulhu
Who'd eat me and who'd eat you, too; We think he is quite a lulu
If it's good enough for Cthulhu He's not good enough for Zulus
Then it's good enough for me But he's good enough for me!
DAO
All the Chinese pray to Yao Next to Yao, they worship Yu
For he showed the farmers hao He built roads and bridges tu
And there's bumper harvests nao And canals - there's quite a few -
Which is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
DEUS EX MACHINA
Gimme that database religion I will learn to use SQL,
Gimme that database religion So my searches will all run well,
Gimme that database religion Though the learning curve can be hell,
It's good enough for me... It's good enough for me.
I will stick with my flat-file, CA-Clipper can compile
Though it may be lacking style, RDDs will make you smile
Its ease-of-use makes me smile, (though its queries take awhile)
And that's good enough for me. Still it's good enough for me!
Oh, 4D it is a monster We're all aware that FoxPro
And can be slow as molasses Runs in Windows and is not slow
At least now it's with compiler (and it's what my bosses bought) so
But it was good enough for Guy! It must be good enough for me.
I will write my code for PICK now And then Pr1me bought INFORMATION
I will write my code for PICK now So there was massive consternation
And when I'm finished I will say WOW! What understated observation --
And that's good enough for me... Was not good enough for me!
I use , not Lotus, I will organize mine relationally,
Though the market-share is bogus; So it re-indexes sensationally --
Like that famous racing tortoise, It's only useful occassionally,
It is good enough for me. But that's good enough for me.
I'll print data from my floppy, I used to perl my flat-file data;
And I'll file the paper copy -- I ran on Unix, so I hadda,
It keeps my secretary happy Now I do it 'cuz it's fasta
And that's good enough for me. And that's good enough for me.
We will keep on writing FOCUS You may code your CRTFORMs
Because Gerry came and woke us They're not dash-CRTFORMs
We will work our hocus-pocus Just wait for MAINTAIN & WINFORMs
And it's good enough for me. They'll be good enough for me.
It was good enough for Simon Fortran, I remember the P-Eight-Fifty
Good enough for Simon Fortran, With 2K you've got to be thrifty
Good enough for Simon Fortran, But the Instruction set's quite nifty
And it's good enough for me. And it's good enough for me
You might think that I'm a yahoo, I am getting one of those work-
Hacking on my seven-oh-two, Stations that are known as PERQ
But it's good enough for Big Blue, Even though there's the odd quirk
And that's good enough for me. It's good enough for me
Now that wire-wrap we're routing We're 'puter hackers who speak jargon
Very soon we'll all be booting And may play chess with good old Sargon
Yeah Gimme that old time computing Have ya got yer mountain boots on?
It's good enough for me (We'll go climbing soon, you see!)
We will write our code in COBOL
DB2, FORTRAN, and SNOBOL
Wanna SPICE up that old low-ball?
They're all good enough for me!
DISCORDIANISM
Let us sing to old Discordia Of Great Murphy much is spoken
Cause it's sure she's never bored ya For his Law shall not be broken
And if she's good enough for ya It's not pretty when he's woken
Then she's good enough for me! Things go wrong for you and me!
If your rising sign is Aries If your god of choice is Squat
You'll be taken by the Fairies Well then trendy, man, you're not!
Meet the Buddah in Benares But you'll get a parking spot!
where he'll hit you with a pie! And that's good enough for me!
We will sing a verse for Eris Let us do our thing for Eris
(Golden apples for the fairest!) Goddess of the discord there is
Though she sometimes likes to scare us Apple's golden, it's not ferrous
But she's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Let us praise the Holy Fool And the brave Illuminatti
For he's breaking all the rules Can hail Eris in a body
Holds you up to ridicule, Tho we think they're rather dotty
And that's good enough for me! They're good enough for me!
There are those who worship Eris It was good enough for Eris
There are those who worship Eris We'd love to have her near us
If you're one of them, you scare us! Her apple is the fairest
So keep away from me! And she's good enough for me!
It was good for the goddess Eris We all know the goddess Eris
Who in anger would not spare us She had an apple for the fairest
Gave and apple for to snare us But we've got to learn to share, is
And that's good enough for me! That good enough for you?
We will praise the wily Trickster We will howl with ol' Coyote
Who of talents is a mixture Pee on bushes, eat peyote
And is famous as a prickster Then we'll roast ol' Mendes' Goatie
And that's good enough for me! And that's wild enough for me!
Say hosannas to "Bob" Dobbs
With space aliens he hobnobs
He's the patron saint of slobs
And that's good enough for me!
(THE ALMIGHTY) DOLLAR
Oh, the dollar is our Saviour There are those who scream and holler
If we spend Her or we save Her And get hot under the collar
She controls all our behaviour For their god, Almighty Dollar,
There's not enough for me! Who is good enough for me!
Let us praise the Almighty Dollar Oh the Dollar is the True God
Let us praise the Almighty Dollar Not the Sun God or the Moon God
Tele-Evangelistic holler 'Cause it's my God and it's your God
And it's good enough for me! And that's God enough for me!
DRUIDS AND FAERIE
We will worship like the Druids, In Pwyll's hall you will be welcome
Drinking strange fermented fluids, But he's not at home too often
Running naked through the woo-ids, Spends all his time in Annwyfn
Coz that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
I'll go get my golden sickle We will worship like Zen Druids
And I'll wear it where it tickles In their non-existant wooids
It ain't used for cuttin' pickles! Don't try to think, just dooid!
And it's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
We'll go riding with Arawn That old wondrous faerie, Morgan
In the dark before the dawn Could appreciate an organ
Wildest Hunt that we've been on! Just as long as it was workin'
But it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Now there was this wizard, Merlin, There's this Druid who is Jewish
Really kept the world a-twirlin' He is nice and sometimes foolish
'Til he got mixed up in girlin' "Oy vey! You don't -look- Druish!"
But he's good enough for me! "Let's define our terms," says he!
Wrap your sacrifice in wicker Oh the Welsh gods, -you- announce 'em
It will make the flames burn quicker Asking my gods to renounce 'em
Tho the smell makes some folks sicker But our gods, I can't pronounce 'em
It's still good enough for me! Being tongue-tied's not for me!
When I hear the Ban-Sidhe wailing When the Morrigu are riding
Sure it sets my heart a-quailing And the fell Trollwives are striding
Death behind someone is trailing I'm sure going into hiding!
And I hope it isn't me! 'Cause that battle's not for me!
When the Wild Hunt fills the evening We will visit with the Sidhe
With a howling and a screaming And we'll drink until we're giddy
How the Lady's eyes are gleaming Leave behind G. Gordon Liddy
And that's where I wanna be! And that's good enough for me!
We will dance 'round with the Dus We will play with the Pookah
Tho he plays us fast and loose It will aspect as a hookah
He plays jokes on me and youse Or a haunted pressure-cookah
But he's good enough for me! But that's good enough for me!
If you like aggressive women Said the Sidhe to their new war-duke
Morrigan with tricks is brimmin' "You must quell Balor, that fierce gook;
Do you groove on S&M-in'? "Just remember -- USE THE FORCE, LUGH!
Then she's just the one for you! "You'll be good enough for us!"
EGYPTIAN
Let us sing the praise of Horus When we all bowed down to Nuit
As our fathers did before us There was really nothin' to it
We're the New Egyptian Chorus (Alex Sanders made me do it...)
And we sing in harmony! But that's good enough for me!
We will venerate Bubastis We will pray with those Egyptians
We will venerate Bubastis Build pyramids to put our crypts in
If you want in, then just ast us! Cover subways with inscriptions,
'Cause that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me.....!
Let us all now worship Ra We will all do praise to Horus
And take care of our Ka In an old Egyptian chorus
We'll all sit round and go "Ah-h-h!" If there's something in it for us
Which is good enough for me! Then it's good enough for me!
Here's an invitation for us We will venerate Bubastis
All to go and worship Horus Cause my cat walked up and ast us
Doff your clothes and join the chorus (Now the cat box is DISASTROUS!)
And that's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
It was good for old Osiris We will worship old Osiris
But what I want to inquire is: As we sit and smoke papyrus
Can you Xerox (tm) a papyrus? We will prob'ly catch a virus
And it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
I prayed to mighty Isis Let us not forget ol' Isis
To relieve romantic crisis She will help you thru your crisis
Now I've got satyriaisis 'N make your dreams glow brightest
Which is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will go and worship Isis We will bow down to Osiris
Tho she won't help lower prices At the blooming of the Iris
We won't find someone as nice as And he'll save us from the virus
She - that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
Oh you need no priests for Amon There's the God who is a monkey
He looks kindly upon laymen His behaviour's kinda funky
'Course he'd much rather lay women And he makes a lousy bunkie
And he's good enough for me! But he's good enough for me!
We will go and honor Isis Let us worship Egyptian Min
She will help us thru our crisis Christians call our orgies "sin"
'Cause she has no minor vices But New Morality is 'in!'
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will go to worship Ammon We will sing the praise of Ra
He will send to end a famine And of Ammon who goes "B-a-a-a!"
Bagels, cream cheese and smoked salmon And the Pharaoh's whole brou-ha-ha
Which is good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
It was good for Mother Hequet We'll all be Egyptian mummies
Who bought babes with lots of racket With bandages 'round our tummies
It was good for Mother Hequet And we'll stagger 'round like rummies
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Thoth (or should we say Tehuti?)
Thinks that scholarship's our duty
Though he's more than somewhat snooty
That is good enough for me!
ELVIS
We will all worship Elvis, We all worship good ol' Elvis,
He's the one with the Pelvis, Though he was kind of selfish,
And some think he's still alive, which, He could rock and grind his pelvis
Is good enough for me! And he's good enough for me!
FICTIONAL GODS, DEMONS AMD HEROES
Here's to those who copy Conan We will sing of Foul the Render,
Here's to those who copy Conan Who's got Drool Rockworm on a bender
They're just Followers of Onan In his cave in Kiril Threndor--
And that's good enough for me! They're both too much for me!
There are followers of Conan. Of Lord Shardik you must beware;
And you'll never hear 'em groanin' To please him you must swear;
Followed Crom up to his throne(in) 'Cause enraged he's a real Bear,
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
St. Waldo is a were Ethyl is the female part
Call on him if you dare Of Sativa's holy art
He may come on as a bear Drink her if you've got the heart
And he's good enough for me! For a holy man to be!
Azahoth is in his Chaos We will sing of Iluvatur,
Azahoth is in his Chaos Who sent the Valar 'cross the water
Now if only he don't sway us To lead Morgoth to the slaughter
That is good enough for me! And that's just fine with me!
We will worship Holy Ford We will sing the Jug of Issek,
Beta, Delta, Gamma, Lord And of Fafhrd his chief mystic,
But the Alphas might get bored Though to thieving Mouser will stick,
A Brave New World for you and me! And that's good enough for me!
Let us note the might of Ils We'll invoke the blessed Camber
With a thousand or more quills And the Unicorn of Amber
By the light that from him spills And the wizard Deliamber
He is good enough for me! They're good enough for me!
The late return of the Prophet Zarquon We will praise the gods of Hagar
Caused his followers to hearken At a sort of Nordic seder
As the Universe went dark on Buy the sacraments from Zabar
All of you and me! And that's good enough for me!
Oh the Trekkies worship Spock "Necronomicon?" I'll buy one!
To the movies they will flock "Liber Eibon" I'll rely on
Girls as baldy as a crock And "The Protocols of Zion"
That's not good enough for me! They're all good enough for me!
We'll pay homage to Godzilla We will worship Paul Atreides
In the Oriental thrilla Tho he sort of lost his sight he
He went and stomped the whole megillah Got a son that's rather mighty
And he's good enough for me! And a Sandworm now is he!
Donal Graeme is part Maran It was good for Bilbo Baggins
And the Com'yn all use "laran" It was good for Bilbo Baggins
Why the hell am I still Terran? Treasure sometimes comes with Dragons
But it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
Michael Valentine is grokking Roger Elwood got religion
Clothing usage he is stopping No more sex in Science Fiction
"Thou art God" the phrase he's dropping Claims we've all got drug addiction
And I'm good enough for me! He ain't good enough for me!
There may be reincarnation The "Necronomicon's" still leadin'
There may be reincarnation All the others its exceedin'
Let us hope we keep our station Just don't move your lips while readin'
and be born again as fen! 'Cause that isn't good for -you-!
You may marching with your Cross go There are Frogs out in the Abyss
You may marching with your Cross go Armed with athame and labrys
I will worship Ghu and Roscoe They are green and rather scabrous
'Cause they're good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
I won't worship ol' Dormammu Let's not worship old Galactus
To that fire-head I'll say "Damn you!" He's more nasty than a cactus
I will worship whales named Shamu Eating worlds takes lots of practice
Or the Chicken of the Sea! He's too scary for me!
I won't worship ol' Bill Cosby We've all heard of Illuminati
Tho he's funnier than Fozzie We've all heard of Illuminati
He is smiling just because he Their security's kinda spotty
Makes much money on TV! It's a conspiracy for me!
Robert Wilson keeps on bookin' We will light up to Sativa
For his titles I keep lookin' I've got toke-weed up my sleeve, a
He always knows what's cookin' Trick I learned in the Yeshiva
But don't take him seriously! And that's good enough for me!
St. Blooper's rather clumsy St. Frieda's quite a mama
If he hits you, you'll feel numsy She can pinch you thru your armor
But he's got a sense of whimsy F*** her to increase your karma
And I -like- the S.O.B.! She's more than enough for three!
St. Hermann's got a bong St. Gerald's quite a fellow
If you sniff you'll be high long Don't you dare to call him yelow
It'll make your eyes ping-pong For he will make you bellow
His dope's good enough for me! So he's good enough for me!
Sativa is no peon
He's the head of our pantheon
Better him than snorting freon
'Cause that'll play hell with your nasal passages man.
Where'd you get this dope anyway? I mean.......
Far-r-r-r-r farking out!
Let us shout to the Goddess Lum Let us huumm for the Great Pumpkin
Let us shout to the Goddess Lum Hum hm huumm hum hum huumm humhumn
From another world she's come From the pumpkin patch he's comin'
And shes good for An-a-me! And it's good enough for me!
Let us question Deep Thought too Let us praise the Babel Fish
Let us question Deep Thought too Let us praise the Babel Fish
'Cause the answer's Forty-Two! For it made God but a wish
And it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
Let us look for the Invisible Man We will worship great Godzilla
Let us look for the Invisible Man Or King Kong, that big gorilla
And see him if we can If ya don't, then they will kill ya
And he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good for Uncle Fester Say hosannas to "Bob" Dobbs
Though he's really quite a jester With space aliens he hobnobs
And a perfect light bulb tester He's the patron saint of slobs
And that's good enough for me And that's good enough for me!
We've decided you are naughty,
If you're not of Landru's body,
Though his robes get kind of shoddy,
They're good enough for me!
THE FORCE
It was good for old Darth Vader For we are the Knights of Jeddi
It was good for old Darth Vader And in us the Force is reddi
He'll be back a little later Grab your sabres, throw confetti
And he's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will even worship Yoda Let us all use the Force
Who is small as an iota Let us all use the Force
But fulfills his Jedi quota And stay on the proper course
Which is good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
If the Force makes you a hater We will worship like the Wookie
Tall and black like ol' Darth Vader 'Cause he gets a lot of nookie
And not recalled by Ralph Nader Thinks the DeathStar's just a cookie
Then you're good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
HINDU
There are some that call it folly We will go to worship Kali
When we worship Mother Kali. Though embracing her is folly
She may not be very jolly She'd be quite an armful, golly!
But she's good enough for me! And she's good enough for me!
As the goddess Kali dances I will wait till four-armed Kali
With her worshippers in trances Drags me thru that lonesome valley
You can learn some Hindu stances She's disgusting act-u-all-y
And that's good enough for me! But She's good enough for me!
So you want's to be a Deva We will sacrifice to Shiva
A real Bodhisavatta We will sacrifice to Shiva
A -really- Old Believe-a If you are a True Believe-a
And that's good enough for me! Then you're good enough for me!
Just like Swami Sachenanda We will worship Jargonatha
Just like Swami Sachenanda But altho we risk his wrath-a
Hold your breath and throw a tantra There won't none stand in his path-a
And you're good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We'll all study the Vedanta We will all practice Tantra
We'll all study the Vedanta Groans and grunts will be our mantra
It's no good for sharks and mantas There is nothing that you can't-ra
But it's good enough for me! So it's sex enough for me!
We will go and worship Brahma We will sacrifice to Kali
Like a Saddhu or a Llama Tho her Thugs don't act too pally
Clad in less than a pyjama When you meet them in an alley
And that's good enough for me! She's still good enough for me!
We will read the Kama Sutra If you want to worship Shiva
The positions are quite "outre" Throw some flower in the river
But as long as you're not "neutre" But if Shiva will deliver
Then it's good enough for me! then that's good enough for me!
You can sacrifice to Kali We will go and worship Shiva
Even if you're no Bengali While we're bathing in the river
Just by mugging in an alley It's so cold it makes me shiver
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will all go worship Rama Kali has her vengance brewin'
Who created quite a drama Against all the evil-doin'
When he rescued his sweet mama It was she shot J. R. Ewing!
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
If a damsel wears a sari Let us take time out to dally
Krishna's arts can make her tarry With the Priestesses of Kali
Some folks say that he's too hairy They need petting to get pally
But he's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
ISLAMIC
We will all bow down to Allah All the warriors for Allah
For he gave his loyal follow- Are sure to have a gala
-Ers the mighty petro-dollah Party time in old Valhalla
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Let us listen to the Prophet We will all recite the Koran
Let us listen to the Prophet We will all recite the Koran
Gets more tail than Andy Offut Scots can stick it in their sporran
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Oh the Muslims worship Allah We will guzzle RC Cola
And obey the Ayatollah When we join the Ayatollah
And they can't drink alcohol-a 'Cause he ain't no Holy Rollah
That's not good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
JEWISH
If you think that you'll be sav-ed Some guys have a circumcision
If you think that you'll be sav-ed On account of their religion,
If you follow Mogen David An embarrassing incision
Then that's good enough for me! Cut just ENOUGH from me!
Let us worship old Jehovah Let us celebrate Jehovah
All you other gods move ovah Who created us "ab ova"
Cause the one God's takin' over He'll be on tonight on "Nova"
And it's good enough for me! 'Cause he's good enough for me!
Oh the Jews prefer Jehovah You can worship God Adonai
But their life is not all clover Be allowed few things to enjoy
'Cause they're hung with rules all over I'd much rather be just a goy
But that's good enough for me! More comfortable for me!
We will observe Tu b'Shevat We will all observe the Pesach
Its a Jewish holiday that And try not to get Tay-Sachs
Sounds Druidic - but don't say that! For God the waters unlocked
Or the J.A.P.s will come for me! When He set our people free!
KABBALLA
We will read from the Kabahlah We will read from the Cabala.
We will read from the Kabahlah Quote the Tree of Life mandala
It won't get us to Valhalla It won't get you in Valhalla,
But it's good enough for me! Yet it's good enough for me!
KRISHNA
We will all sing Hare Krishna Hare Krishna gets a laugh on
We will all sing Hare Krishna When he sees me dressed in saffron
It's not mentioned in the Mishna With my hair that's only half on
But it's good enough for me! But that's good enough for me!
I was singing Hari Rama Hare Krishnas worship Rama
With my friend the Dalai Lama With their tamborines and drum-as
'Til they dumped us in the slammer But their lifestyle is a bumm-a
But that's good enough for me! That ain't good enough for me!
MIDDLE EASTERN PAGAN
We will hoist a mighty flagon To Our Lady of Ephesians
To the honor of ol' Dagon Who has taps for all secretions
And we won't go on the wagon We will dance like Polynesians
Which is good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
I'll sing some songs to Lilith, We will have a mighty orgy
Not so young, and not so girlish, in the honour of Astarte
and She's always PMS-ish, it'll be a mighty party
but She's good enough for me! and it's good enough for me!
Lilith wears a lacy nightie We will sing to Lady Isis
And She is a little flighty She'll stand by us in a crisis
She will get you all excite-y And She hasn't raised Her prices
She's wet-dream enough for me! And She's good enough for me!
We will all bow down to Dagon We will all bow down to Enlil
A conservative old pagan We will all bow down to Enlil
He still votes for Ronald Reagan Pass your Cup and get a refill!
And that's good enough for me! With bold Gilgamesh the Brave!
Let us worship sweet Eninni Oh the ancient goddess Nerthus
Let us worship sweet Eninni From herself the Earth did birth us
In a skimpy string bikini And I wonder: are we worth us?
And that's good enough for me! But she's good enough for me!
With Inanna don't try flirtin' She got eager for Dimuzi
To your freedom she'll say "Curtain!" Said she'd meet him up by Nuzi
'Cause she finds it most impertin- Now he's taking quite a snooze, he
Ent tosay "She don't suit me!" Might revive next century!
We will go to worship Lillith Well Dimuzi's on vacation
Grab your cup, step up and fill it He'll be back when spring awakens
Tho 'ware she don't make you spill it! There will be such recreation
And that's good enough for me! There will be enough for me!
Oh the Phillistines abound We will all bow down to Moloch
Oh the Phillistines abound We will all bow down to Moloch
They had the biggest Baals around 'Cause his Pope is not a Polack
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
If you want to save your soul, ac- I'll let Moloch light my fire
-Cording to the priests of Moloch Of his worship I won't tire
You must sacrifice a Polack Cheapest baby-sitter's hire....
And that's good enough for me! And that's cheap enough for me!
We will bow down to Astarte We will go and weep for Tammuz
And we'll have a great big party And we'll laugh at Springtime's promise
And your welcome will be hearty And a few then will be mommas
And that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
We will bow down to the Goddess When we gather with Astarte
As She wears Her Cretan bodice It will be a lovely party
And the women cry "Come prod us!" And the lovin' will be hearty
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will all go worship Rimmon We will go and worship Baal
All us Pagan men and women For he is the Lord of All
And our goblets will be brimmin' In the fields and in the hall
And that's good enough for me! He is good enough for me!
Let's go for temple prostitution We will build Baal up an altar
It's an ancient institution In our duty we'll not falter
That provides a quick solution And we'll drink our barley malt-er
For horniness in you and me! And that's drunk enough for me!
Erishkigal was a vixen
But when Nergal got her mixin'
Socially, she soon was fixin'
His connubiality!
MITHRAISM
We will sing a song of Mithras We will all be saved by Mithras
Let us sing a song of Mithras We will all be saved by Mithras
But there is no rhyme for Mithras! Slay the Bull and play the zithras
Still he's good enough for me! On that Resurrection Day!
MOONIES
We will worship Sun Myung Moonie Oh the Moonies worship Moon
Though we know he is a goonie (Not the Goddess but the goon)
All our money he'll have soonly They'd eat his s*** without a spoon
And that's good enough for me! And that's not good enough for me!
Sun Moon's kids are kind of funny
But they stick to him like honey
He just wants their souls and money
And it's good enough for him!
MORMON (LDS)
We will worship like the Mormons I will have a Mormon mammy
And we'll be Masonic doormen Tho' her hands are kinda clammy
'Round the Temples we'll be swarmin' They believe in polygammy
And that's good enough for me! And that's wives enough for me!
Moroni's job is simple: We'll be reachin' thru the curtain
Blowin' jazz from top the Temples With the women we'll be flirtin'
Loud enough to pop your pimples! Secret handshakes, we are certain
And that's good enough for me! Will be good for you and me!
We will worship with the Mormons
'Cause they're not like Martin Bormann
Into gods they'll be re-bornin'
And that's good enough for me!
NEW AGE
Oh, our Spirits will awaken Well I'm tired of Ronald Reagan,
Oh, our Spirits will awaken He's too square to be a pagan,
Watch the Universe a-quakin' Let's all vote for Carl Sagan!
Which is Gurdijeff to me! He's good enough for me!
Timmy Leary we will sing to I'll arise at early mornin'
And the things that he was into When the Sun gives me the warnin'
(Well, at least it wasn't Shinto) That the Solar Age is dawnin'
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
In the sky I hear a hummin' Just like Carlos Castenada
It's the UFO's a-comin' Just like Carlos Castenada
That's not banjos that they're strummin It'll get you sooner or later
But it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
NEW AGE CHORUS: Gimmie that New Aeon Religion
Gimmie that New Aeon Religion
Gimmie that New Aeon Religion
Where everyone's a star!
NEW WORLD PAGAN
Let us pray to the Great Spirit Let us pray to the Great Spirit
Let us pray to the Great Spirit Let us pray to the Great Spirit
Like the Eagle he will hear us Like the Thunderbird He'll hear us
And it's good enough for me! And It's good enough for me!
Let us join the Earth Spirits Let us journey like the Shaman
Let us join the Earth Spirits Let us journey like the Shaman
With the Earth they will heal us To the next de-men-shan
And its good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
Thanks to great Quetzacoatl Some folks pray to the Great Spirit
And his sacred axolotl Most folks just cannot get near it
And his gift of chocolatl So they hate it and they fear it
And please pass some down to me! But it's good enough for me!
Praise to Popacatapetl Some folks worship the Kachinas
Just a tiny cigarette'll Some folks worship the Kachinas
Put him in terrific fettle They look like "deus ex machinas"
So he's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
Now watch out for the Maya's, Montezuma liked to start out
They might really try to fry ya, Rites by carrying a part out
Sacrifice people, not papaya's, That would really tear your heart out,
Just as long as its not me! But it's good enough for me!
Quetzacoatl's flyin' And when old Quetzacoatl
With the Toltec and the Mayan Found a virgin he could throttle
And the mushrooms he's been buyin' And put her heart into a bottle
Are good enough for me! It was good enough for me.
We will worship Xochipilli We will worship Xipe-Totec
Though it might be a bit silly Tho it is a little low-tech
Running naked makes me chilly It is not a bit ero-tek (erotic)
But it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
Oh, there's none like Huizlipochtli The Kachinas of the Hopi
For destroyin' people tot'ly Dance about and some act dopey
Best to worship -him- remotely! They don't leave you feelin' mopey
But he's good enough for me! So they're good enough for me!
I have gotten in the way-o When the blood it was a-surgin'
Walkin' with the Monster Slayer Aztec priests wore skins of virgins
He is worthy of a prayer Cause they had transvestite urgins
And he's good enough for me! That ain't good enough for me!
Be the Great Spirit devotees We will worship like the Incas
On the mesa smoke peyote Who were great heroic drinkas
'Til we think we're all Coyote Tho the Spanish called them stinkas
And that's good enough for me! Still it's good enough for me!
Come and worship Huehueteotl Let us sacrifice to Chac Mol
Sit around and chew peyotl For rain just burn some copal
What a way to get totalled! Hey! There's a flood out in the hall!
And it's good enough for me! And it's wet enough for me!
We will go to worship Inti We will dance unto the Sun
Soon around us we will all see Pull weights stuck thru our buns
Cocaine being snorted freely Yank 'em out at a dead run
And that's stoned enough for me! And that's pain enough for me!
We will worship with the Sioux We will all be Contrary
Use the bushes for a loo Walk backwards, and we'll marry
And scalp Gen'ral Custer too! A Sioux "winkte" (that's a fairy!)
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
NORTHERN EUROPEAN (GENERAL)
We will praise the god Toutatis I was there when Lemminkainen
When the Pagan frenzy's got us Crazed the winin' and the dinin'
Till we strain our epiglottis And left poor old Louhi whinin'
And that's good enough for me! Which was quite a sight to see!
We will go and worship Veles There's the Russian god Yarilo
All us Pagan gals and fellows As a love-god he's a thrill-o
And we'll Czech out what he'll sell us When he comes there is no chill-o
And that's good enough for me! And he sounds a lot like me!
We will bow down to Perkunas I remember Vainomoinen
And we'll chant old Baltic 'runos' Chasing Winter on that mornin'
Save the dolphins and the tunas As the Spring came finally dawnin'
And that's good enough for me! And that was good enough for me!
Then there's ol' Koschai the Deathless
He will leave you a bit breathless
Face him with steadfastness
And it's good enough for me!
OTHER LANGUAGES
Nous nous appellons Druides,
C'est peut-etre un peu stupide,
Et vienon d'Atlantide.
Mais c'est bon assez pour moi
RASTAFARIANISM
Jah will come to set us free here I be talkin' to da Great Jah
Jah will come to set us free here With me dreadlocks and me ganja
We won't see Him but He'll be here I be a Rastaman, ya!
And that's good enough for us! And it's good enough for me!
Let us mourn Haile Selassie
As a Rasta Saint, he's passe
But as Emperor, he's classy
And that's good enough for me!
SATANISM
Oh the Satanists worship Satan There are those who worship Satan
And behave so aggravatin' And are just anticipatin'
I think they need castratin' Armageddon's conflagratin'
And that's good enough for me! That ain't good enough for me!
Asmodeus will excite us There are folks who get their hats in
To an orgy he'll invite us They go out and pray to Satan
He may have his High Priest bite us On TV this gets a ratin'
But that's good enough for me! And Geraldo says "Oh, GEE!"
I would go and worship Satan I will kill an old black rooster
If I could memorize verbatim Show that I'm a Satan booster
'Cause with him there ain't no fakin' He's not drawing like he uster
And that kinda frightens me! But he's good enough for me!
We will all go to the Black Mass We will follow Satanism
And kiss the goat on his ass And use a disgusting chrysm
Tho you think it hasn't much class Made of blood and old stale jism
Still it's good enough for me! And that's pretty gross for me!
It was good enough for Satan Then there's Michael Aquino
Whom the Christians are all hatin' Thinks that Set is really keen-o
But the Beast they are awaitin' (Satan moved to Argentine-o
And that's good enough for me After World War Two, you see....)
JUST PLAIN GRATITUOUS SEX
I got a new diversion Gimme that real old-time religion
It's a new kind of perversion! Where sex ain't doled out in smidgens
I gotta ask: Are you a virgin? And we don't sacrifice no pigeons
'Cause that's good enough for me! It's good enough for me
You are very, very pretty Let's forget those moral urges
As you sing this little ditty Get your spurs and chains and scourges
I like little ditties.... And accentuate your urges
And I like big ditties too...!!! So come and play with us!
At the Festival of Milcom Ancient British music is such
Let the women on the Pill come Put the BBC well in dutch
And then everybody will come! Just because that it was too much
And that's good enough for me! Saxon violins for TV!
SCIENTOLOGY
L. Ron Hubbard liked precision In matters Dianetic
And he founded a religion You need not get frenetic
That has caught a lot of pigeons Make your Engrams copacetic
And it's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
SHINTO
There are some who practice Shinto I don't really go for Shinto
There are some who practice Shinto It's just something I'm not into
There's no telling what WE'RE into! Tho I guess I could begin to
but that's good enough for me! 'Cause it's good enough for me!
In Japan they thought it neato Well the Japanese use Shinto
When they worshipped Hirohito There's no telling what they're into
But that didn't sit with SEATO It helps them outsell the Pinto
So it never more will be! And that's good enough for me!
Ameratsu brought the light in We will venerate the Kami
And love's bonds began to tighten Tho they don't wear no pyjommies
The whole world began to brighten And they ain't got any Mommies
And that's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
THELEMA
Uncle Crowley was a dreamer When the clouds they are a-rumbling
At the Abbey of Thelemer And the thunder is a-grumbling
But his magic is a screamer, Then it's Crowley that you're mumbling
So it's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
There are those who follow Crowley Let us call an Elemental
Tho the stuff that he held holy For a temporary rental
Turn your your brain to guacamole Just as long as it is gentle
But he's good enough for me! It is good enough for me!
It was good enough for Crowley The Thelemites worship Crowley
With his sacraments unholy While he's roasting very slowly
Who smoked pot and ate some moly 'Cause they think he's so damn holy
And it's good enough for me! He don't do a thing for me!
It's no good for Jerry Falwell Magick's language is so queer
And he don't think we're at all well Causes Crowley to appear
But the Great Rite's when we ball well And to stick it in your ... ear!
And that's good enough for me! That's not good enough for me!
Let us not forget St. Crowley There are those who worship Crowley
For he's humble, meek and holy 'Cause they say he rhymes with "holy"
Kind and jolly, roly-poly, What I say is "Holy Moley!"
And that's good enough for me! "Perfect love, and ninety-three!"
When the wind is turnin' howly Ninety-three and forty-leven
And the thunder's gettin' growly Sixty-nine and eighty-seven
Then you know you're workin' Crowley Crowley won't get you to Heaven
And he's good enough for me! Ain't no good for you and me!
VOODOO
There are people into voodoo There are people into Voodoo
Africa has raised a hoodoo With a mojo and a hoodoo
Just one little doll will do you I know I do, I hope you do!
And it's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
If you're really into dancing We will all go worship Shango
And you wanna try some trancing Who will make the thunder bang-o
Then the Voodoo gods are prancing End the drought down in Durango
And that's good enough for me! Which is good enough for me!
WICCA AND GENERAL NEO-PAGAN
Well, she raised an awful flurry When old Gerald got it goin'
When she made the scholars worry When old Gerald got it goin'
Thank the Gods for Margaret Murray! All that hidin' turned to showin'
She is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Granny It's not good enough for Reagan
She could throw a double-whammy It's not good enough for Reagan
That would knock you on your fanny He's too square to be a Pagan!
And she's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
With the aid of my athame Meeting at the Witching Hour
I can throw a "double-whammy" By the Bud, and Branch and Flower
(And can slice and dice salami!) Folks are raising up the Power
So it's good enough for me! And that's where I want to be!
There will be a lot of lovin' We will worship with the witches
When we're meetin in our Coven 'Cause we're rowdy sons-of-bitches
Quit yer pushin and yer shovin' And they scratch us where it itches
So there's room enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Well the Christians all are humming We will gather at our saunas
Cause they say their God is coming, When the spirit comes upon us
Our God came three times this evening To perform the Rites of Faunus
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Some folks worship all of Nature Perfect love and perfect trust
Tho they love to taunt and bait-cher We shall rise up from the dust
They're just funnin', they don't hate-cher And become the upper crust
And they're good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We are Children of the Goddess After converts we're not chasing
And the Horned One begot us And their money we're not fleecing
And with love the Craft they taught us Still our numbers are increasing
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We are children of the Wicca In the face of Inquisition
And although we may bicker We maintained an Opposition
Our loving is much quicker And preserved the Old Tradition
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
When the blizzard is a-whirling We survived the conflagration
And the Yule log is a-burning And emerged with jubilation
And the Sun God is returning In a new reincarnation
It is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
When the ice is a-breaking Now the candles are a-gleaming
And the buds are a-taking And the Cauldron is a-steaming
And the Lady is a-waking And the full Moon is a-beaming
It's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
When the day meets the night Let's go skyclad all together
In equal dark and equal light Dance the Circle round the heather
God and Goddess shall unite Never mind the freezing weather
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
On the evening of the May Come and join the celebration
Round the fires buring gay Pour the Goddess a libation
Witches dance the night away You don't need initiation
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
When Midsummer fires burn When the red-necks say we're sinning
Ere the Sun begins to turn I don't care, 'cause we are winning
Comes the flowering of the fern And this is only the beginning
And that's good enough for me And that's good enough for me!
When the Sun is a-going When the souls of the departed
And the crops have finished growing Come to join us, cheerful-hearted
and we reap the fruits of sowing We know in death we are not parted
It's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
When the night meets the day Our High Priestess is a doll
When leaves turn brown and skies turn grey But she's fond of alcohol
And the Sun is going away Carlo Rossi she'll extoll
That is good enough for me! But she's good enough for me!
Our Coven is a bunch Our High Priest thinks he's Conan
But I have a sneaking hunch But he cannot keep a bone-on
That their brains are out-to-lunch He resorts to the Rite of Onan
But they're good enough for me! But he's good enough for me!
Our Maiden is a virgin Our Maiden is a virgin
But her big toes keep divergin' But her buttocks keep divergin'
And she don't need any urgin' In Greek Rites she don't need urgin'
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Our Summoner thinks he's lusty Our Witch-Queen has a tushie
But his balls are gettin' dusty Which is big and wide and plushy
And his nail is gettin' rusty Altars under her go sqooshy
But he's good enough for me! What e're the carpentry!
Our Coven has a charter Our First-Degree has curves
They recieved from some old farter That give all men the swerves
And they gave him one in barter It gets on the ladies' nerves
But it's good enough for me! But she's good enough for me!
Our Healer shaves her thing Our Neophyte's a fool
Once a month we see the string But he's got a ten-inch tool
Back and forth it tends to swing He'll have Third Degree by Yule
But she's good enough for me! If all the girls agree!
Our Familiar is black Those Evangelists all say
With a white stripe down his back They possess the one true way
When his tail goes up, make tracks, I'll take Wicca any day
'Cause it ain't perfumery! And that's good enough for me!
When the full Moon's in the sky Up the chimney, down the street
And the witching hour is nigh Flying at ten thousand feet
Flying ointment we'll apply Hey, Pan Am, we gotcha beat!
And that's very good for me! And it's good enough for me!
Our Bard is macrophonic Our chalice holds six quart
And he thinks he's so harmonic And our wine -- it sure ain't port!
But he's more like cacophonic It's distilled in a retort
And he plays a mile off-key! But it'sh good enough f'me!
Our Book-Of-Shads is old Our rituals are diverse
Every page inch-deep in mold Every week a different curse
'Cause the store where they are sold Goddess! What if they reverse?
Got flooded by the sea! It won't be good enough for me!
Bakersfield has Minstrel Puck We were told in Pagan class
Who with verses shows much pluck That leaping cauldrons is a gas
Though I think he'd rather ...play But I got a roasted...pentacle
But he's good enough for me! And I can't sit down for tea!
Outdoor skyclad is for wierdos Gavin Ice took out his phallus
Who forget about mosquitoes And he stuck it in the Chalice
And they zap you like torpedos Please don't pee, Gav, out of malice
That ain't good enough for me! That ain't good enough for me!
I inherited from Mommy When a witch says "wackawacka"
I inherited from Mommy You must kiss her "smackasmacka"
My big, black, switch-blade athame And recieve one "backabacka"
And it's ba-a-a-d enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will worship in the Northwest The God of Man entices
Where the water is our fortress Paganism our life spices
Where the Lord and Lady know best So just 'ankh' if you love Isis
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Grannie As the waning year is ending
It was good enough for Grannie Young and old souls now are blending
It was good enough for Grannie Voices round the Circle sending
And she taught it all to me! Samhain joy across the worlds!
Through the endless night we shiver Pagans gather in the clearing
Flames around the Yule log quiver For the end of Winter's nearing
As we sing to praise the Giver And the Maiden is appearing
Of the Sun on Solistice morn! Bringing promises of Spring!
Light and darkness stand together Hand in hand we leap the fire
Leafing birch and flow'ring heather To the meadows we retire
Brethren clad in fur and feather To fulfill Beltane desire
Tell us Spring has come again And give seed unto the land!
While the Solistice Day is fleeting Joy and fruitfulness abound
Bull and Stag again are meeting On Lammas Eve, the fertile ground
For the honor of repeating Reveals the gift of Love that's found
Vows that bind them to the Queen! When the Horned One dies once more!
For the Wintertide preparing Always be polite to witches
Harvest baskets we are bearing Always be polite to witches
Goddess bounty we are sharing If you cross them they are bitches
When the night and day are one! And they throw some nasty spells!
It was Gerald wrote the ditty When I first became a pagan
And Al Crowley made it pretty It was daring and outragin'
Ain't traditional one bitty Now my Circle's started agin'
But it's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
We will follow Gerald Gardner We go skyclad for the Goddess
In our faith he is our partner So we wear no shirt or bodice
All that scourgin' makes it harder And it isn't very modest
But it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
Let's all hug our Earthy Mother We will gather come the Lammas
There is nothin' that I'd druther It is writ in Nostradamus
She's better then any other We will take off our pyjamas
And She's good enough for me! We'll make merry, She'll be pleased!
I've got a modern-type athame Some are self-initiated
And it packs a six-part whammy Tending to be addle-pated
That'll knock you on your fanny If their rituals are X-rated
Samuel Colt made it for me! That ain't Wicca, don't you see!
It was good enough for Brigid It was good for Gerald Gardner
Oh, she surely isn't frigid Scourging is a penis hardener
She sure keeps Jack's pecker rigid Then you do it to your partner
And that's good enough for me And that's good enough for me
It's those good old connotations I'm full mooning evil spirits
Which make grow the Pagan nations Throwing wild derriere fits
Leading us to conjugations And on me they can't lay their mitts
And that's good enough for me! 'Cause my charm's protecting me!
To the Goddess lift our glasses MAPPCAF I and II were heaven
And let's all get off our asses And the spirits worked like leaven
Teach those Pagans, hold them classes I can't wait 'til MAPPCAF VII
And that's good enough for me! More than good enough for me!
We will pray for Ruthie Carter We will worship Frey and Freya
That she may become much smarter Yao and Vesta, Lugh and Gaia
And put on a Witches' Garter Any more? Perun! and Maia!
And that's good enough for me! That's still not enough for me!
It was good enough for Tim Zell We will jump the old bonfire
It was good enough for Tim Zell Tho the flames are roaring higher
With that beard he'll never freeze, well If you miss you join the pyre
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good enough for Margot Burn Damiana for a lover
It was good enough for Margot And burn Rowan to the Mother
And her book I could not forego Cense will show many another
And it's good enough for me! Clear the smoke! I cannot see!
All the apple trees wassail It was good for Beltane fires
As we heft the flowing pail Put out by lying friars
A good cider mixed with ale It was good for Beltane fires
And that's good enough for me! And it's good for you and me!
We're all children of the Goddess If you think that you're a Bard
We're all children of the Goddess Go and practice in the yard
She always fed and shod us Annoy the neighbors till you're tarred
She is good to you and me! And feathered, but don't mention me!
Give thanks to the Earth our Mother Hail to Regan and to Sagan
Give thanks to the Earth our Mother Hail to Regan and to Sagan
She'll care for us like no other I'm a San Diegan Pagan!
And she's good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
If the HP wants some lovin' This old Cosmos needs the Grace in
As an entrance to his Coven God and Goddess for creation
Shout it to the Gods above Take them both in combination
That that's not Wicca, don't ya see! And you have the true T'ai Ch'i!
Oh they say its knife and chalice
But we know its quim and phallus
In the woods or in the Palace
And that's good enough for me"
ZARATHUSTRIAN
We will pray to Zarathustra It could be that you're a Parsi
And we'll pray just like we usta It could be that you're a Parsi
I'm a Zarathustra boosta! Don't need a ticket; you get in free
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
I pray to Ahura-Mazda I can't rhyme Ahura Mazda,
He's one god who sure won't pause ta I'll praise the man who tries ta
Pound some heads when given cause ta Then I'll wait for Barak Raz ta
Which is good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
UNCLASSIFIABLE VERSES AND UNKNOWN GHODS
Let us watch Ka-ka-pa-ull Where's the gong gone? I can't find it
Frolic in her swimming pool I think Northwoods is behind it!
Subjecting chaos to her rule For they've always been cymbal-minded
And that's all right with me! And they're good enough for me!
They revered ancient ENIAC Some folks pray to the Orishas
And sacrificed to UNIVAC Tho their humor can be vishas
Now we sing our chants on VAX pack When they grant your stupid wishas
And that's good enough for me! But they're good enough for me!
When you worship Rusto There are those who worship science
Treat your friends with lust-o And some would send 'em to the lions
Pursue your faith with gusto! Without 'em we'd have no appliance
And that's good enough for me! So they're good enough for me
We will all bow down to Gozer John, Paul, George and Ringo
Priestess did it with that Joser We will worship playing Bingo
Cross the streams, and there she goes, sir We will listen to them sing-o
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Drink to FUFLUNS he's just fine I have got a strange religion
The Etruscan god of wine I will worship Walter Pidgeon
This verse doesn't really rhyme Is he sacred? Just a smidgen!
But it's good enough for me! But it's good enough for me!
We'll do a film on Caligula Let's have one verse that's Carl Sagan's
The perverted Roman rula He's seen Earthmen, Martians, Vegans
It will make a lot of moolah But he's yet to meet us Pagans
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me
We will sing to Ronnie Ghu un- We will have no mullets voided
-til they ask us what we're doin' Within annulets conjoin-ed
'Cause it's good enough for you an' If it's good enough for Ioseph
Babe, it's good enough for me! Then it's good enough for me!
I like old Hewlett-Packard, Sing a chorus of "Hosannah!"
Whose old software can be hackered Sing a chorus of "Hosannah!"
And their printers' been all lacquered Hit the Top Ten in Nirvana
And they're good enough for me! And it's good enough for me!
Sigmund Freud, now he's another We thought Lashtal Lodge was snooty
"Kill your father, screw your mother" So we founded Camp Tehuti
Feeling guilty's such a bother We will make off with the booty
No, the shrinks are not for me! And that's good enough for me!
If I come a fatal cropper It was good for Jimmy Carter
Then a rebirth would be proper He just wanted to be a martyr
I'll meet up with Cosmo Topper He coulda been if he'd been smarter
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
Doctor Bob and ol' Bill W. We will go down to the temple
Clean from alcohol will scrub you Sit on mats woven of hemp-le
'Cause your Higher Power loves you Try to set a good "exemple"
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We will praise the goddess Gorgo There's a goddess known as K'rta
For a skill we would not forego She, from whom all life doth s'prta
Makes the bull and ram and boar go And She won't let us get h'rta
(M: And it also works on me!) And She's good enough for me!
(F: And it brings my men to me!)
We shall drink throughout the day When Alphito gave us beer
And to junk food not say nay We all raised a ringing cheer
Thru the night to Ralph we'll pray We will surely hold it dear
In the toilet bowl, you see! As we drink up, merrily!
We'll all follow Tanna Hanna We give thanks to Gregor Mendel
Celebrate Solistice in her manna Pea plant's alleles he did bend-el
Let her be our menu planna Now we breed men just like Grendel
That's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
We all like to go skinny dippin' It was good for Boojum-Under-the-Rock
After which, we're often drippin' He keeps money in his sock
And some of us are trippin' Has big ears and a great big nose
And hey there! Wait for me! And that's good enough for me
Well, gather me in a basket Let us all go squeeze the Charmin
And then find me a lead-lined casket Send Mister Whipple back to farmin'
Three Mile Island blew a gasket He will find our pranks alarmin'
And that's all that's left of me! And it's good enough for me!
Down in Jonestown they were boozin' There's a woman I've heard tell on
And there might have been more enthusin' Thinks a gay is just a felon!
Had us Pagans been there loosin' Throw her into Mt. St. Helen!
But that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
It was good for Mother Shipton We will all go be nice SCAdians
It was good for Mother Shipton And get nice and truly laid - ian
And her herb teas sure beat Lipton Not a lot of them are maid-i-ens
And that's good enough for me! And that's good enough for me!
With the old traditions cracking The wacky ol' inventor
Modern Amazons are packing With his brain a bit off-centre
What they used to be a-lacking Whomped up A-bombs for adventure
And they sure look good to me! And that's good enough for me
When Erzulie takes the floor-o Kuan Yin, she of Potalaka,
Her seductiveness scores Four-Oh Of sharp words is not a lacker
If she'll fool around some more-o Best that you not be a slacker
Then that's better still for me! To be good enough for Her!
THE OBLIGATORY LAST VERSE(S)
If you think these verses floor us It's the opera written for us!
Then go write another chorus We will all join in the chorus!
Just as long as you don't bore us It's the opera about Boris,
Then it's good enough for me! Which is Godunov for me!
THE FINAL WORD
We will bow down to John Boardman Joe Bethancourt's a swordsman
Tho he's not a master swordsman And he also is a Hordesman
Verses of this song he hoards, man And he'll sing 'til he gets bored, man
And he's good enough for me! And he's good enough for me!
Give a rest to old religion, If you want a new edition
If only just a smidgen. Let its writing be -your- mission!
It's really not my pidgin, As for me, I'm goin' fishin'!
Though it's good enough for you! Or I'll go and watch TV!
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677 verses: Last update 07/21/94
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We are -always- interested in more verses! Please send them to:
WESTERN USA: Joe Bethancourt EASTERN USA: John Boardman
PO Box 35190 234 E. 19th St.
Phoenix, AZ 85069 Brooklyn, NY 11226
locksley@indirect.com
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The first full edition was released on 1 May, 1993 as REALOTR1.TXT,
and all subsequent updates are numbered sequentially. It includes
_ANAKREON_ numbers #6, #8, #10, and #12, plus Joe Bethancourt's
collection.
This is not to be considered the second update. It contains
all of REALOTR1.TXT (the original computer file collection),
REALOTR2.TXT plus new verses, but is being posted as a request for
more verses only. The new verses are not always tacked
onto the end of the old ones, due to format considerations, so ya
gotta look a little bit for some of 'em. Nyahh! Nyahh!
The 666th verse of this collection was written by Leslie Fish.
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